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Saying Goodbye

8/15/2016

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 Because of the work that we do, our staff unfortunately experiences a lot of death.  Oftentimes, we have 2-3 clients per week pass away.  I have written more sympathy cards than I can count in my 5 ½ years with Cancer Patient Services...

I can't tell you how often I've heard the phrase, "I could never do your job".  As you may agree, witnessing death weekly can be too sad or too hard for some to deal with emotionally.

The hard truth is…it is hard to see clients die from cancer.  I get sad.  I get emotional.  Usually, I cry.  Clients are like family to us.  It is difficult to watch cancer ravage their bodies – steal their energy – and see our clients face their own mortality.

I struggle watching families deal with a cancer diagnosis.  It is heartbreaking to watch a young father leave behind a wife and two small boys.  It saddens me to see a wife married over 50 years struggle to live without her life-long partner.  It is hard for me to see grown children lose their mother, their person to go to in times of difficulty.

But actually, grief and sadness aren’t the feelings that overtake me.  I am grateful.  I am grateful that, in some very small ways, CPS is able to make their life a little better.  Grateful that we were able to share a smile or some laughter.  Grateful that I am allowed to come into their lives at a very difficult time.  Grateful that they trust us enough to be vulnerable and ask for help. 

We see people at their worst; shattered, afraid and often angry.  And let’s face it, they have earned the right to show all of those emotions. They got dealt a sh**tty hand of cards.  But, as the amazing Randy Pausch, author of The Last Lecture,  described  it “We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” 

So, I am grateful that we get the opportunity to help clients and their families play the hand they have been dealt as very best they can.  I actually find joy in the process, and not surprisingly, they usually do, too.

If you would like to see The Last Lecture given by Randy Pausch and presented by TED, here is the link. If you would like a copy of the book, we have several here in our office.  We are happy to share them with you.

Please consider making a donation to help us stack the deck for our cancer patients and their families. #thelastlecture #randypausch #cpsbeatcancer
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    Author

    Carol Metzger is CEO of CPS. After losing her husband and her mother to cancer, she gets the gravity of a cancer diagnosis. But, in working with CPS clients over the past five years, she also has seen happiness and friendship evolve out of the support and love we extend one another. This blog is a lot of Carol’s first and second hand experiences with people going through cancer, and she welcomes comments and feedback from you. 

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